I had the first of the mccloghry offspring... Max Kingston McCloghry. On February 27. He was amazing... perfect... little toes and fingers... all put together... woven & spun by the master creator. He just came early. I was only 23 weeks and 5 days pregnant, which is basically 6 months in translated prego lingo, and i went into labour on tuesday really late , i guess really wednesday morning sometime around 1 or 2 am, only i didn’t know i was going into labour so i toughed it out all night thinking it was what they call braxton hicks which are like practice contractions... but they weren’t. i even got up the next morning and went to work, caught the ferry, actually, ran for the ferry because i was running late... i called the midwife and she said just come in just in case, even though she thought it was braxton hicks too. so i caught a ferry back home. got home and realized it was getting really painful... called matty, who called me a cab because he was to far and it would have taken him longer to get home... and i realised it was getting REALLY painful and called and ambulance who arrive in what seemed like and eternity and carried me down the 2 flights of stairs in our apt building and drove me to my hospital which thank God happened to be the closest. they wheeled me straight into labour and delivery where the doctor said the baby was breech (which means he was butt first and not head first - their supposed to be head first) and she said i was 9 cm dialated... you dialate to 10 before having the baby... and i had the baby with in 20 minutes of getting to the hospital. Max was 720gms and 30cm long... ie... almost 1 !/4 lbs and about a foot long.
He was beautiful. As soon as he was born the doctors inflated his lungs and got him stable and let us say hello and then whisked him off to the neonatel ICU. I recovered for as short of time as possible and went over straight away with matty to see him.
He basically was perfectly healthy and growing well in the womb and for some reason just came early. We’re not even sure medically if there’s a reason. We spent from 1205pm midday on the 27 of Feb with him until that night at 1025pm when he went to be with Jesus. We were sitting there and and held him for 2 hours or so while he was still breathing just staring at him and adoring him and the nurse told us there was nothing else they could do, and asked if we wanted to hold him and have her take out his life support and we decided thats what we would do... So i held him and matty held me while my little max took his last breath in our arms.
i’m not sure if there’s any feeling worse than that.
There’s a few things that i know though. I know that God is on the throne. That Jesus is reigning and Ruling and the Holy Spirit is our comfort. I know that GOd is bigger than max’s lungs being to little to breath correctly because He made every bit of his little body. I know that God had/has the power to heal rescue and save. I know that I would rather have what He chooses than anything else. I know that the enemy must restore what he’s taken. I know that God is holding my little max and he’s raised by angels and walking with Jesus and matty and i will see him again and hold him one day. and i know that just as God could have healed Max, little maxy is healed to perfection now walking in heaven in his glorious new little body and God is healing and rescuing me and matty. i know i love God more than ever before, and i trust Him more than ever before and i know that i love my amazing and strong husband more than i knew i could love and person in the world and i love him deeper. and i know there’s many more little bubs to come to our family, and we’ll tell them all about Max and Jesus and Glory.
We believe that what the enemy has intended to break and destroy us and our hearts, God is going to use for good. We believe that our hearts are truly secure and not shaken because we believe in a Holy God who we KNOW loves us. Death was defeated at the cross of Christ and there is Hope beyond what this world sees as the end. This isn’t the end for us, just a road bump until we see our little boy again.
Pray for us because this is a crazy hard time, and we’re just working through it day by day... pray that we’ll have strength and courage to walk back into what life consists of... work and "normal" things that won’t ever be like they were before this...Pray that we will be encouraged and always looking to the Hope that called us before time began.