Tuesday, November 9, 2010

the final weeks.

I honestly have to say I can hardly believe I am writing this, still pregnant, at 34 weeks...or 8 1/2 months... it feels so surreal. like... totally surreal.

All my heart keeps whispering throughout my last weeks & months over and over is 'God is so good'... and there is this soft refrain that keeps singing 'victory', and a beautiful knowing that the enemy is defeated by the power of our mighty God. The enemy was always defeated, even before this victory of a little girl growing healthy in my tum... but to see the outworking of such a victory...it brings that glorious defeat to the forefront of my mind constantly. It is a constant reminder that all those things I know are so wonderfully true are playing out in a story of life right in front of my eyes.

It has certainly been an adventure, a ride of wild curves and swerves as we've made our way through the last months. I spent about a week in hospital at 29 weeks after our little maizey made an attempt at escaping a little early... and all was well after some precautions were taken... and again God was faithful and Maizey was healthy and happy with a bit of encouagement to stay put. Then, this past Sunday, we gathered together as a church family to record the 2011 Hillsong Live Album marking another year since losing our Max and marking a huge miracle victory as I had the privilage of standing and singing while carrying our healthy baby girl in my womb.

It seems as I type all of this, that I'm again overwhelmed by the simple fact that the story is just that... its the facts belonging to such a greater picture. Important? Absolutely! Our stories are so vitally important... but as I think about the story that is our (matty and my) lives together, I see so clearly that they only frame the substance which really matters and is true no matter what the up or down of the story is at the moment. The truth and the substance that is the constant, that makes up the fabric of who we are in every season is Jesus... the JOY of that washes me over. He will never change... No matter what comes in life... He will always be the center of our lives... and as the story frames the substance of us... we always live with the same truth and hope.

Maybe its just my pregnant brain as I type this all out, but I feel like there's a revelation in my heart today. I'm so beyond thankful for this beautiful baby that will be in my arms soon. Lord knows, she's been prayed for and so long awaited... but i'm also very aware that there are so many of you that are still in the waiting season... waiting for your promise... waiting for the answer you've been crying out for... and I feel like God's saying so clearly to let Him be your substance and to let him frame your life with a story that will glorify the substance that makes you up. He will never stop being faithful and true... and in the waiting He will be glorified as the constant in your heart and life.

i'll leave you with a little photo of late. the 34 week equator shot ... its getting harder and harder to take these simply out of vanity! ha!



As well a little update on Haylee (if you don't recall, she was our foster daughter for a little over a year)... she's doing great! She is about to be fully restored to her dad, so we are praying for him every day, believing he is going to be the very best dad she could have ever had... believing for his absolutely success in life and the next few years learning how to parent a toddler. We saw Haylee for what will most likely be the last time a couple weeks ago and she was BEAUTIFUL of course, walking and chatting and being the absolute treasure she always is...




xxxx

26 comments:

~*Gabrielle*~ said...

Hi jill!

Am so excited for you! :) You are such a testimony of Daddy God's restoration and what bravery to record the new album even though you are almost at your full term. :)

There is SOOOOOO MUCH MORE of His goodness coming your way. :)

Yaimie said...

Wow Jill.. i hope this baby will bring JOY..
Sometimes we forgot that Jesus will always be there, that's what has happened to me.. but reading this, i remember that someday He will answer my prayer..
thanks for posting this :)
It's so great to know a little bit more about you.
and i hope everything will be going great with your little baby :D
Greetings from Guatemala!

Jessica Almeida said...

Jill thank you so much for allowing us to (sort of) being a part of your life. I am beyond ecstatic for you and your new baby girl. =] You believed that God would grant you this gift, and once again He reigned. May God bless you and your growing family =]

ma·vis [mey-vis] –noun British (chiefly Literary). a song thrush. said...

but i'm also very aware that there are so many of you that are still in the waiting season... waiting for your promise... waiting for the answer you've been crying out for... and I feel like God's saying so clearly to let Him be your substance and to let him frame your life with a story that will glorify the substance that makes you up. He will never stop being faithful and true... and in the waiting He will be glorified as the constant in your heart and life.

... This is such a timely word of encouragement. I would like to repost on my site.

Our part of miracle making is our complete dependence on God. If we wait on the Lord, the miracles will be more than anything we could have imagined.Your testimony is great. Many blessings for you and your growing family.

Jason and Kristin said...

Jill - SO excited for you that your little girl is going to be in your arms soon! I can't wait for one day when we finally get to meet :) Love to you!

Ioana` said...

Hey Jill, Thanks so much for posting this.It is a really encouragement.I`ve almost burst into tears when I read the wonderful words that God put in your mouth "I feel like God's saying so clearly to let Him be your substance and to let him frame your life with a story that will glorify the substance that makes you up. He will never stop being faithful and true... and in the waiting He will be glorified as the constant in your heart and life." This is just amazing, it`s what I need right now to help me go forward.I`m still waiting for God to fulfill His promises in my life.
May God bless you and your wonderful family!
Love,
Ioana

Caroline said...

yay! i'm so happy to read this update :-) it had been a while and i was so keen to hear that everything was ok. you've been in my prayers. He is so faithful!
Calli xx

Silvi said...

it's amazing how much trust and faith you have in god. each time you blog i say to myself: this is exactly the connection that i want to have with god. happy that your baby girl is doing so well. i'll be praying for your little family and all families on the earth. much love ♥

Sally Eliza said...

jill u are such an inspiration to trusting God and staying faithful in the hard seasons!! i love reading about your journey and i seriously praise God that ure beautiful girl is doing so well....this is going to sound weird but about a year ago i remember thinking about u and God told me to tell u but i didnt cause i didn't wanna be wrong gotta love the disobedience...but he told me u would have a baby and it would be a little girl!! and im sorry i didn't tell u i was just being silly but just wanted to tell u so u had that extra knowing that a year before it all God gave a total stranger this confirmation that this beautiful little girl would be coming!! :)

u are inspireing me to keep going through a hard season i am facing so thank u!!

u are one amazing woman of God!!

praying for ya xx

ElsaRaquel said...

Hi Jill,
I'm sure your story is blessing many lives ...I'm very blessed by it.
Get along this new phase of your life... you and your husband deserve it
There is much more to you and your family ;)
You're in my prayers
Love
Raquel

ElsaRaquel said...

Hi Jill,
I'm sure your story is blessing many lives ...I'm very blessed by it.
Get along this new phase of your life... you and your husband deserve it
There is much more to you and your family ;)
You're in my prayers
Love
Raquel

sha said...

so encouraged by your words and by your faith and praise to God. With my first baby girl (who is blessed to be almost 2yrs old) she was born about 7 weeks early and many complications of her dying if i didn't allow her to be delivered that early. but God is a great God that he protected her in the deliver process. though it was a challenge for her to have been in the hospital for over a month (due to her prematurity) God is faithful to his promise to not give us anything that we cannot handle...and YES the enemy is defeated! sometimes we just need a push to remind ourselves of that.

jill, may God continue to protect your womb and allow your delivery to be successful with no complications. may the promise of divine health be on your daughter as she is born and throughout her blessed life.

love and God bless.
myvintagesundays.blogspot.com

erin m. said...

thank you jill for inviting us into your story. your joy, pain, and the whole journey. thanks for living out an example and inspiring me to see the victories of Christ and ways I can trust Him better in my own life. prayers and blessings, can't wait for the next post, which will most likely be when your little baby is here!!

Jen said...

indeed, {love}.

You are precious.

Cherie Baker Vann said...

all I can say, with some tears, is "thanks". I know I feel like I'm on the same journey, so thanks for reminding me of what is ahead!

Melody said...

Jill, God truly restores all things. I lost twin boys born early in 2008 and this year, gave birth to a son - Nehemiah David. He was born at 24 weeks and the Lord brought him forth despite brain bleeds and illness. As of today, be is 13 pounds and perfectly healthy. One day we will all celebrate and be with our little ones again; your little Max and our Eli and Enoch.

God is good! Congratulations on the promise of God fulfilled!

Bek's said...

Jill,

thank u for these words..
you inspire so many.
I pray for u and u family and this new bundle of joy...
manyu blessings....

Rebeca

Beeducky said...

Jill,
Thank you so much for your encouraging words x
I am so pleased that your baby girl is growing and will be here with you so soon. Praying that God's peace is with you over the next few weeks before her arrival. I love reading your blog, it fills me with such hope and excitement for the day my husband and I finally hold our promised bubba too. God is such a faithful, true, loving and beautiful Abba.
B x

The Hafts Happenings said...

Wow, so awesome to read. Thank you for sharing. Our God is amazing!! WIll be praying for you and your little one. Savoring Him - Marlo

Michael Wenham said...

So pleased for you all. Welcome, little Maizey! God is so good. Peace and joy for Christmas! With love from England.

Jessica said...

Oh wow!! I've been popping in every couple of months for a couple of years now! Overjoyed to hear your news! By my calculations you'd be pretty much ready to pop by now! What an awesome Christmas present! Congratulations!!!

I just want to thank you heaps for your vulnerability. I started reading ur blog a couple of years ago when I lost my son, Judah, at 18 weeks - I think I left a little note? Anyway just knowing that there are other people that walk this difficult road and battle through the genuine questions of trust, faith and suffering has been really significant. So thanks.

My little girl just turned 1. God is indeed faithful!

Bless u. xo

Netanya said...

wow im so stunned by what God has already done... I've been keeping up with the whole experience since I heard about it and I'm truly blessed. You and little Maizey have truly been an inspiring reflection of what God can do. And the love that you and your husband kept through it all is just beyond my understanding and just shows the beauty of God and how he loves us!
Thank you so much for sharing... awesome thing is that the journey hasn't ended yet there is so much more joys to follow... :)

Marije said...

I've been following your story since the beginning of your blog and saw on twitter that you had your little girl! Congrats!

Would LOVE to know how you are?! Hope you are well and everything went smooth and peaceful!?

Maybe you'll find the time to write a blog entry about this amazing miracle you have longed for so much... This is what you have prayed for/longed for and now it's in your hands and I am SO happy for you and would love to see you write about it :-)
IF you can find the time while being sleep deprived, cooing over your baby and getting used to being a mom to a newborn! :-)

Toyin O. said...

What a touching story Jill,Praise God for all he is doing in your life. I could be wrong, but are you the same Jill that led worship recently at Hillsong NY. It looks like you are the same person, I don't know your full story, but it sounds like God has done some amazing things in your life. And I absolutely thought you were amazing the night you led worship at Hillsong NY. Praise God for what he is doing thru the Hillsong worship team, you guys are all amazing. You can only imagine what your music have done for me over the years. You obviously had the baby, congratulations on that. I know you will make an awesome mom:) God Bless!

Jennifer said...

I just wanted to say thank you for sharing the things God has worked in your life. It has impacted my life in a way only God could foresee.

Blessing on your and your little one!

Dina said...

I was just sharing your and max's story with my girls tonight as we sang my favorite worship song, desert song, along with you on youtube. we had a daughter at 24 weeks and remembering your story as I watch you sing reminds me of how blessed we were with a miracle. thank you for your courageous worship through your life and ministry. congratulations to you and yours on the arrival of your daughter! blessings...